This Blog Is Dead
so… yeah. I blinked and it’s been over half a year since I last posted anything here. this year was a lot – always running, always behind on something... but also weirdly happy <3
I don’t even know how it happened but it’s been over six months since I last posted anything here.
I kept thinking “I’ll post soon,” and then I didn’t.
"today is the day". then I didn't, over and over.
this isn’t a proper 2025 summary (that will come)
but I wanted to show up with something, some loose thoughts with a bunch of random photobooth shots I found on my laptop. I won’t even pretend they’re in order. they’re just here, it doesn't matter.
presenting the mess
ok, back to messy update –
there’s a relationship in my life, a new but familiar territory... sometimes it feels perfect, like “how did I live without this?” and sometimes it brings all kinds of chaos, responsibilities and drama. but it’s teaching me so much, about myself, about closeness, about not ghosting people when things get boring or complicated (lol).
my first hair oiling
life on fast forward.
always tired. always five tasks behind. 100 unreplied messages and tasks in progress, "inbox zero" on to-do list each day. my brain is hot. but also weirdly content? like when you’re sleep-deprived but finally doing what you’re meant to do, or finishing that stupid edit overnight. sending out a nice brief. task done, I feel more alive.
probably 'too much' was going on
we travelled
a bit this year, not huge glamorous trips but cute memories and adventures.
Albania, Luxembourg, Germany. food poisoning, laugh bursts, work that felt like holidays.
we got sunburned, lost, overwhelmed, euphoric, angry, quiet, close.
we took a few steps through the world together.
and now these weird tiny moments live in my head and nowhere else.
perfect.
Dorota, our new lil cat
and work.
somewhere in the middle of the year, I got my new camera. and it was like my soul clicked into place.
something about new equipment and fresh energy. I literally felt more alive (thank you G.!); projects started flowing in, new shoots, new files filling up hard drives.
some came out amazing. some came out… uhhh.
but every one of them was like a side quest in an open-world game. The Sims but it's real life.
so this is my best angle
yeah, this isn’t everything.
there were a few weeks when I got back into bodyweight training – probably some of my best days this year. my workouts were regular, I felt stronger, clearer, like my body and mind were finally syncing up.
now I’m back to falling asleep at 3 or 4AM and not working out at all. so it goes.
outfit check?
it’s not even a chapter — just a messy page. and it’s 4AM again.
honestly, no surprise I haven’t posted in a while. maybe it’s because I can never fit all the thoughts and feelings in one place, and then it feels like it’s not even worth trying. such a stupid thought!
lots of love!
